There’s not a single person who is virtuous, or even valorous. Left to our own habits and desires, that’s a true statement. Outside of God’s description, virtue (or valor) doesn’t exist. But within God’s spirit, all of us can find and follow His principles, causing our lives to glow.
Fortunately, God’s told us what He thinks about virtue. The virtuous woman of God described in Proverbs 31 provides us with a framework not to be feared, but embraced.
It’s not a laundry list of “do’s and don’ts” we have to do to earn God’s favor. Instead, it outlines what we get to do to please God and our families. With God’s help, each of us can become a woman of valor.
Who is the Proverbs 31 woman?
To be a woman of integrity, according to the Bible, is to turn to God and let Him build her character. Proverbs 31:10-31, otherwise known as the “virtuous woman scripture,” explains her core attributes.
One version describes Proverbs 31 as “The Virtuous Wife” (NKJV), while the Tree of Life version uses “A Woman of Valor”. Translated from the Hebrew (אֵֽשֶׁת-חַיִל – “eishet chayil”) we see that the woman described here is a mighty woman, not unlike the force of an army that displays valor through strength and courage.
Either way, this passage shows that embracing our inner valor or virtue means becoming an active and powerful partner in the life of our families and communities.
Looking at the list, it’s easy to recognize the Proverbs 31 woman. She’s the ultimate “Christian girl,” the one you see at the church potluck and admire (or perhaps envy). She’s the girl staying and serving when the going gets tough. She’s the woman embracing change and adventure with well-intentioned plans (never a hair out of place, of course). Rarely is she the woman staring back at us in the mirror.
While you might confidently identify with one (or some) of these qualities, other virtues may require more effort.
We’re often unduly hard on ourselves, but it’s important to remember: you’re human. Because you’re human, there will be days when you will feel like you’re nowhere near being a Proverbs 31 woman. That’s okay, because these are qualities we get to grow as we’re empowered by God’s grace. As Christian women, we have the privilege of learning the patterns of valor.
Thankfully, biblically, the “ideal” woman does not mean perfection, but rather, turning to the one who is—Jesus.
“…a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” – Proverbs 31:30 (NLT)
How to build virtue as a Proverbs 31 woman
During those times when you feel “less than,” remember that you were created in His likeness and image. You are made for more.
Who best to seek strength from than God, the perfecter of your faith? As you ask for God to give you the grace to be who He wants you to be, rest knowing that He’ll guide you through every storm.
Our Christian walk is a constant process of refinement, so, fear not! You won’t necessarily have to get up before daylight, then burn the midnight oil because the “spindle” you ordered from Amazon arrived. Instead, here are some practical steps to breathe vitality into those virtue muscles:
Set aside time to soak in His Word and listen to His leading. You can start with meditating on each verse in Proverbs 31:10-31, one verse at a time. Reflect on how this translates to your daily life.
Next, take action when you hear from Him. What has He been gently reminding you about? Perhaps He’s been encouraging you to extend grace and generosity towards someone, or to grab coffee with a friend in need.
Lean on Him. Remember that Jesus is your Redeemer. He makes all things possible for those who believe [Mark 9:23]. Being the best version of oneself is not always easy. Thankfully, you can do all things in Christ who strengthens you [Jeremiah 29:11].
Ultimately, being a Proverbs 31 woman means exuding Christ. It means being the salt and light in this broken world, so that our lives ultimately point back to Him. In fact, even the broken places in our lives can act as vessels for His love when we give Him space to move. When we’re doing that, we’re living the Proverbs 31 life.
As you soak in His presence, know that He will guide your every step as you journey as a woman of God.
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”
An experienced writer and communicator with a heart for marginalized people. Part of the CHM marketing team, her desire to connect people to God and to each other fuels her passion for serving others through the written word.
